Trump’s New “The Apprentice” Mega Show

Frenzied activity is the order of the week in Washington, in New York, and across the Bible Belt too. Resumes are being polished, hair trimmed, and scripts memorized.

It is quadrennial job-hunting season for the strivers and self-promoters with an eye peeled for the big opportunity to land a slot in the soon-to-be Orangutan administration.

Most have been prepping for years in the holding pens at think tanks, law firms, universities and consultancies. Now they are champing at the bit.

Minds have been scrubbed of anything that might snag on the gates that guard the corridors of power. Prospective high-flyers, in particular, have made sure that their views mold themselves to those of the insiders like a pair of jeans soaked in the bath.

Free-for-all

The competition itself is so keen as to conjure images of the Oklahoma land rush or a cattle stampede on the Chisolm Trail.

Key to a successful campaign is networking – at full tilt. The personal touch (active or passive) is what it is all about. Mike Pence’s email or cell phone is equivalent to the Holy Grail.

This uncouth free-for-all has not been successful in stocking the federal government with the wisest and dedicated public servants.

It does remain deeply entrenched in American political culture, though, despite the serial policy disasters that have beset us. Still, hope for the Republic springs eternal.

A better way

So here is a suggested alternative for selecting those who will rule us-the-people: The president-elect, longtime former “Apprentice” and “Celebrity Apprentice” reality TV competition host, should give in to his instincts and stock the cabinet in a nationally televised political version of America’s Got Talent.

There is, of course, no guarantee that the system – however designed – will not produce a 12-year old ukulele player as Secretary of State. Then again, given the current set of names being floated…